Thir13en Ghosts Review

Review of Thir13en Ghosts (2001) by screenqueeen: 👍 3.5/5

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It's incredibly admirable that this decides to just not be a beat for beat remake of Castle's classic. The core idea is one of the more creative I've seen from these 2000s remakes of Castle's works. But like the house itself, it traps these ideas into a somewhat less interesting formula that forces a series of more limiting events to transpire in the aftermath of the house's own version of the ticking clock.

I'm a real nerd for examining archetypes and in revealing how each ghost is an example of one we don't get anything to flesh out how the people who became these specters landed where they did. I want to know more about the Bound Woman, whose is hardly shown, or the Angry Princess, or The Hammer (who looks like a product of racist ritual killings not dissimilar to Candyman's own origin, yet is relegated to providing just a couple jump scares and a moment of tension for Shaloub's character).

I take these in stride because of how everything focuses on this ritualistic ultimatum Kriticos has been planning towards, especially in the 2000s style of horror that seems so naive in the face of the torture porn boom that was waiting around the corner. It's not afraid to just be a little goofy, which is keeping in heart with how William Castle preferred his horror, but was unleashed into a world that can't necessarily accept no explanation for certain things however bare bones they could be.

The embarrassingly titled THIR13EN GHOSTS is still an absolutely fun time, and may be best paired with Castle's original to spot all the nods it makes. But the real disappointment comes from not having a single ghost be that spooky Italian chef from the original. There's just no excuse.